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Monday

Nov302009

Worried You Are The Rebound Guy? Here's 4 Signs To Look For!

Post written by

Terez

The Hook-Up

Against your better judgement, you let your best friend introduce you to his wife's very attractive single classmate.

Much to your surprise, you two hit it off!

You have been going out for a few dates now, and she seems to have all of the qualities you have been looking for.

However, in the back of your mind, something is nagging at you.

She tells you that you are special and she enjoys your company, but she seems to be holding something back.

During the course of conversation over a romantic dinner, she reveals she has recently come out of a serious relationship.

So the question of the hour is: is she really into you, or are you just the rebound guy?

Before I continue, let me just say that being the rebound guy isn't necessarily a bad thing, it just depends on what you are looking for in the relationship.

If you are not looking for a serious relationship, being the rebound guy can seem like winning the lottery.

She is just looking for someone to make her feel special again. You are just looking for someone fun to hang out with.

On the other hand, if you are looking for that special someone and want to settle down, being the rebound guy can only led to you getting your heart trampled on.

The Signs

In either case, it's best to know were you stand with this new woman in your life. So, the following are four telltale signs that she may not be over her ex:

She Still Talks About Her Ex. If she frequently brings up her ex during her time together wtih you, than it is a good chance she has not gotten over him yet. If someone has truly moved on from a previous relationship, they are focused on their new partner. If an ex is constantly being mentioned, then he is still weighing heavily on her mind. This is a huge red flag!
If Her Breakup Was Very Recent. If her previous relationship ended within the last three months, odds are she is still licking her wounds. Spending time with you may be her way of boosting her self-esteem, making her ex jealous, her just wanting to have a good time, or all of the above.
The Physical Factor. If your relationship is based purely on the physical, then chances are she is not looking for anything serious, but wants to keep things fun and light.
How She Talks About You. You have been dating for several weeks now, but she has resisted introducing you to her friends and family. Even if she does relent and you meet the other important people in her life, she insists on introducing you as her "friend." This is a clear indication that she does not consider your relationship of any serious relevance.

The Ball Is In Your Court

Let me reiterate that if you are the rebound guy, this isn't necessarily bad news.

It really just depends on what you are looking for in your relationship. If you are looking for something more serious, be honest and tell her how you truly feel.

This way you both know where each other stands.

Doing this will help to prevent misunderstandings and hurt feelings.

Now, if you need ideas on how to bring up this "hot button" issue in conversation, check out the book 1000 Questions For Couples.

I'm proud to be affiliated with the author, Michael Webb, because he is a real expert at providing deep insights on specific issues couples need to talk about.

His book can definitely help you discover where you stand.

Finally, what are your opinions about being the rebound guy? Are there any other signs I left out that need to be mentioned? Please share your thoughts by commenting below.

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